Jake's birthday letter

**I'm way behind on my posts, but I'm going to skip ahead for today, and go back and update the rest later**

I've decided to try and continue this new tradition of writing a letter to my kids on each birthday.  I'm a week late in writing one to Jake (flu got in the way), but I'm finally ready to sit down and compose a few thoughts.

Dear Jake,

This past week you turned 4.  On the morning of your birthday, I went into your room to greet you, and we talked for a few minutes about how it was your birthday:

You are so cool Jake.  In some ways, I could easily say "I can't believe it's been 4 years!!! 4 years since you were born!", but I don't know if thats how I really feel.  It's actually kind of hard to remember what life was like before you were here.  And also, you Jake, are an old soul.  Your ability to form rational thought, and have adult conversation keeps things interesting. You are sensitive and observant, and such a cutie pie...and it makes you awesome to hang out with.  In about 10 years, those qualities may mean some trouble for mom and dad, in terms of dating.. ;) Luckily, you also seem to have a strong moral compass, and my hope is that you will let it help you to make good choices in your life.

Even at four years old, I can tell that you are very loyal to those you love.  You show genuine concern for the feelings of your family and friends.  This past week, we all took turns catching a bad 24 hour flu.  You got it first, and when the day came that mom and dad caught it, you and Mia went and played at your Aunt Jessica's house all day.  When she brought you home, the first thing you said to me was "are you feeling any better mommy?".  In fact, any time I am under the weather, you are quick to go and find your favorite green blanket, and will hand it over, telling me it will help me feel better. :)

Last year, right after your third birthday, we packed up and moved you away from almost everything that you knew.  You've adjusted really well to living in Arizona.  You love swimming, and being outside--2 things we do a lot of around here :)  You love riding your bike, and going out to the grill with Dad, to make dinner and kick around your soccer ball.  Every night before you go to bed, you ask me "Mom, what fun things are we going to do tomorrow?"  I'm so happy that you like spending time with me too.  I know that eventually you'll get to the age where hanging out with mom isn't very cool, so I'm trying to really soak up these years when I'm still your number one girl. :)

I kind of get the best of both worlds with you Jake.  On the one hand, you are very good at entertaining yourself, and can spend hours playing with your cars, playing on the Ipad, and watching stuff on Netflix.  But you also really love being social!  You love your Sunbeams class, spending time with Sawyer, and can make friends quickly on the playground.  You are so excited to start preschool this August.  (Between you and me, I think you're more ready for that milestone than I am.)  Spending my days with you isn't very stressful, its fun!  I'm nervous about the upcoming changes, but I know it's the best thing for you. 

I'm so thankful that you were sent to this family.  I can see why you came first.  Your personality is totally suited to being a "big brother".  Thanks for helping out with your sister all the time.  She's still pretty little, but you try to play with her just the same.  She is feisty and dramatic, but you are good at making her laugh, and keeping her our of trouble.  Eventually, I hope to have more kids (you keep bugging me about wanting a brother), and knowing you'll be around to help out is comforting :)

I feel like I can't say it enough: I love you so much Jake.  4 years ago, you changed my life, giving me the best gift ever.  When you were born, you turned me into a mom.  I know I'm not perfect, but since your life became my responsibility, I feel like I've become a little less selfish.  More importantly, my faith in God has increased.  The irrational love a mom feels for her babies--it's the closest thing I can compare to the way our Savior loves us.  I'm very lucky that I was given such a special job in this life.  Raising you and your sister is the most rewarding, chaotic, crazy, fun, awesome job ever. 

 1 minute old

1 Year old

2 years old

 3 years old

4 Years old

Happy 4th Birthday Jake.  I love you so much it hurts :)